Last Monday I told myself that I was retiring from sports betting. And yet here I am getting a text from my bookie on Monday morning.
The best part about betting is that each week you learn something new, then you lose a bet and everything you learned goes out the window. "I'm never betting on the 49ers again", then the clock stuck 8:00 and I was balls deep in the 49ers -3. After being up 9-0, they ended up losing 30-18. Way to go smoke, way to go.
The 1:00's bullied me. The Chiefs actually fucking suck. Their defense stinks more than a public restroom. They get no push up front, and their cornerbacks are the exact opposite of the Israeli dome, they can't guard shit. AJ Brown had 8 catches for 133 yards and a TD. They made Ryan Tannehill look like Dan Marino. As if betting the Chiefs wasn't enough, my extra chromosome ass bet on the Miami fucking Dolphins. I mean what in the fuck was I thinking. We are so fucking pathetic is terrifying. The Falcons are notorious for choking in the 4th quarter, but only the stinky Dolphins would give them CPR, and let them win the game.
After getting manhandled on the 1:00's I changed my tampon and swept the 4:00 games. The Raiders were free. money. The Eagles fucking suck, their offense is wishy washy, and hasn't looked good since week 1. On the other hand, this was a big game for Vegas. This was the their first home game since Gruden kicked the bucket, you just don't fade teams on emotional weeks. I followed up the Raiders game with the Bucs team total over 30, which cashed by halftime. Tom Brady is an absolute freak. I have nothing else to say.
Well you know what they say, if you lost on Sunday, you gotta make it back on Monday, I don't think anyone says that but I do.
Pick for Tonight: Saints -4